You is Me......

It takes a tragic event for most of us to realize that life is too short. And even then we only think about it till a few days after the funeral or whatever, then it becomes a fleeting thought at the supermarket quickly overtaken by the decision to buy raisin bran or froot loops. To some being grateful all the time is like being nice all the time, it just isnt possible. You never think about true love until you see a movie that makes you cry. It makes you think of all the one night stands you have had and how over the years it has beaten you down to a level of no return. You cry for no other reason then that is the one thing missing in your life. And the pain of never knowing it is so intense it brings tears to your eyes. You want to so bad to be the man in love, but you know it's not possible. Sharing your life with another person and giving them everything you are is so foreign to you. You wouldn't know true love if it smashed you in the face with its warm loving hand.
You think the healing process for any ailment is finding someone or something to use up and throw away like a piece of toilet paper. And you wrap your hands around your legs banging your head into your knees, as you sit naked in the cold dark basement of a bleak meaningless existence that once had the potential to be a gentle loving life. You have chosen this path. What you once thought was breezy summer day has now become a cold dark ice storm stinging your naked body as you stand on the ice with no cover. The blanket that once protected you is now buried under a frozen lake. Time is the only thing that will melt that ice and it is the one thing you cannot grasp..... If you are unable to fix the clock..... There will never be a sophia.